Sunday, August 13, 2006

[Movie] KANK: IT-style Review

On 2006-08-12, Saturday, we watched “KKKabhi Alvida Na KKKehna”, a movie directed by KKKaran Johar and starring SRK, RM, AB, Jr AB, PZ, KD, JA, AR, etc etc, ad infinitum. Here, I have written a review using typical IT jargon. Hope you will enjoy it.

  1. The program KANK has not been built as per proper Functionality Design Specification (script).
  2. The director should have first created a proper Design Document (screenplay) and then begun the actual coding.
  3. AmitabhBachchan is a powerful class with a number of methods and functions but it has not been effectively used.
  4. AbhishekBachchan, a derived class of AmitabhBachchan, inherits all the attributes and properties of its parent class.
  5. ShahRukhKhan and RaniMukherjee are emotionally overloaded and go into an infinite weeping loop every 60 milliseconds.
  6. The methods such as Songs() and Cinematography() have been properly executed and produce fantastic results.
  7. PreityZinta is an abstract class, which looks pretty but actually does nothing.
  8. Functions like ArjunRampal, JA, and KD pass NULL values and are redundant.
  9. The program takes an unbearably long time to terminate… about 3 hours and 20 minutes.
  10. Overall, the package is not worth purchasing. You may opt for pirated copies, though.

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